Friday, November 30, 2012

Cocaine Zombie's Book Review

Okay, I have to admit this is the first time a book has stumped me and that doesn't happen often, especially a book that is as small as this one is. With only 198 pages, I still had trouble finishing it. It was mildly disturbing but the bigger problem was it jumped around so much I had a hard time following what the heck was going on.

The title itself is not nowhere near what this book is about so I don't get the title either. Gosh, for once, I am actually out of words! But, I will give it a good try and hopefully, if you have read the book, maybe you can explain it to me because I missed the whole point of the story and that don't happen often! The book is Cocaine Zombies written by Scott A. Lerner.

Here is an excerpt from the back of the book:
Samuel Roberts, a small-town lawyer in Urbana, Illinois, is contacted by a prospective client accused of selling cocaine. Nothing Sam hasn’t handled before. Or is it? Thomas is accompanied by a mysterious and exotic beauty named Chloe. Who is she, why is she paying for Thomas’s defense, and why is the accused so antsy around her?  
Soon after Sam takes on the case he is plagued by terrible nightmares. Only, in these nightmares, when he dreams of death, people die. Realizing that he is out of his depth, Sam enlists the help of his friend, Bob Sizemore. Bob is oddly insightful about the supernatural and deeply suspicious of big business and the government. Sam and Bob soon discover that a major German pharmaceutical company has been using human guinea pigs to test a highly addictive and dangerous derivative of cocaine first developed in Nazi Germany.  
Combined with ancient herbs provided by a Voodoo priest, the substance has become increasingly addictive and dangerous. After Thomas’s head shows up in Sam’s refrigerator, suspicion naturally falls on him. 
Now he has no choice but to face the forces of evil head on. But how do a small-town lawyer and a computer geek defeat an enemy with the power to enslave mankind?
Okay, here is what I don't get. Things are okay up until the point when the lawyer, Sam, needs to talk to his client after he learns that there is a video plainly showing him selling the cocaine. So, he goes out to the house which is really run down and looks like no one has lived there in forever.

Sam goes in and Thomas has a gun pointed at him the whole time and then says, "You shouldn't have come here", which I thought was odd, if the man is gonna try and get you off on the charges, wouldn't you want to speak to him? He acts like he is out of it or something and finally Sam realizes he needs to go.

Then all of a sudden, the police call him back out to the house and when he gets there, he is taken to this strange bedroom that is really nothing like the rest of the house. It is grandeur and opulent but also has a headless Thomas hanging! And on the ceiling in blood is the message, Come Join Me Sam. It scares the crap out of Sam and he wonders why the police have called him.

Well, first because his name is written in blood (which really, if he was the killer, why would he write his name in blood on the ceiling?) then there is his business card, which is very self explanatory, he is his client and he did come to his office and hired him, so Sam gave him his card.

Then there is supposedly this witness who says Sam had been to the house that day. Sam was offered a beer while he was there but he did not drink it but he did pick it up. (which I thought was pretty dumb), but it's a story so I'll leave that be. Sam is really rattled and goes home to settle down. He opens his fridge to get something to drink and there is Thomas's head, all nice and neat on a bed of leaves like it's the entree sitting on lettuce!

The whole story from this point on gets so irrational I thought this is where the book just takes on a whole new weirdness that I have trouble keeping up with. For whatever reason, and I still don't get it, why would Chloe and whomever, frame Sam? They are the ones who went to him for help in the first place. He doesn't know anything, just trying to do his job and figure out how to best defend him so I don't get why they framed him.

But what is even weirder is Sam's reaction and what he does with the head, almost made me lose my lunch! Why he had to go to such extremes is beyond all comprehension. He does things to that head that no ordinary person in their right mind would do and then calmly cleans up the mess and then sets out to hide the remains and all the items he used to get the job done.

But see, here's the part that doesn't make any sense, did he not think that someone might be watching the whole thing? Because later on we find out with the help of his computer nerd friend, Bob, that his whole house was bugged and had camera's which means someone knows what he did with the head! So, that whole bizarre thing that happened in the kitchen was not necessary. Also, just because of what he did, doesn't mean it can't be identified. Duh, all they need is DNA and blood samples to prove who it was. (the head, I mean).

So, from this point on, I am easily distracted from this book and it's hard for me to concentrate because I keep going back to how dumb it was what he did with the head and that somehow the police know because he isn't back home from getting rid of the head just a few minutes when they come with a warrant to search his house.

Luckily for him, they didn't have one for his car, or he would have been screwed. Now, he knows for sure, that the police think he did it and they are hell bent on proving it and with great clarification he finally understands that someone with money is behind all of this because of the hour it is that they would have had to get the DA's office involved and get a judge to sign off on a warrant tells him they think they know alot more than even he doesn't know.

Which means, is someone in the police department hooked up with Chloe? Secondly, things really do get hinky when another client who is accused of a drug related bust also, is found hanging. Mmm, I might not be a police expert, but even I would be suspicious as to why this is all happening all of a sudden to 2 client's that are Sam's and you can tell from his office and his so called part time helper, that he doesn't have a whole lotta money, so if he was in on the drug stuff, wouldn't he have a nicer office, nicer car and even a nice place to live?

So, this is where the book loses me and I am still struggling to finish it but I knew this would be enough to either pull you into wanting to read it because it sounds like something right up your alley or you are just curious to see what has me so baffled.

For such a small book, I am still trying to finish it and I started it over a week ago and it eludes me still. I am on page 89 of a book with only 198 pages in it but in those 89 pages, a whole lotta stuff happens and that is where I think the problem lies. So much has happened in that little time space that it is really hard to keep up with it. I am truly stumped on this one. I am not saying it's a bad book, I just don't get it.

Maybe you will and if you do, will you let me in on the secret? I hate being stumped and I hate even worse, not being able to finish a book before it's due. First time this has ever happened and I want to know why!

Happy Reading!

About the Author:
Author and attorney Scott A. Lerner resides in Champaign, Illinois. He obtained his undergraduate degree in psychology from the University of Wisconsin in Madison and went on to obtain his Juris Doctor degree from the University of Illinois in Urbana Champaign.

He is currently a sole practitioner in Champaign, Illinois. The majority of his law practice focuses on the fields of Criminal law and Family Law. Mr. Lerner lives with his wife, their two children, and their cat Fern.

Lerner collects unusual antiques and enjoys gardening, traveling, reading fiction and going to the movies. Cocaine Zombies is his first published novel.

Coming soon, the sequel: Ruler of Demons.
You can find Scott online at

Disclaimer: Mary Bearden personally reviewed these products. I did not receive any monetary compensation for my review, just a sample product. All opinions are mine and belong to me solely. My thoughts and opinions may differ from yours.